Tuesday, February 12, 2019





Marie Selby Botanical Gardens - A Living Museum,
Sarasota, Florida

The Road Less Traveled... a Year of Possibilities

You Say, Lauren Daigle
I keep fighting voices in my mind that says I’m not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low?
Remind me once again just who I am, because I need to know 
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh 
You say that I am Yours
And I believe, oh I believe 
What You say of me 
I believe
The only thing that matters now is everything 
You think of me
In You, I find my worth, 
In You I find my identity, 
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
And You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe, oh I believe What You say of me
Oh, I believe
Taking all I have and now I'm laying it at Your feet
You have every failure God, and You'll have every victory,
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe, oh I believe
What You say of me
I believe
Oh I believe, yes I believe
What You say of me
Oh I believe 

Songwriters: Paul Mabury / La
uren Ashley Daigle / Jason Ingram

It's time to ACT... Authentic, Committed, Tenacious - My "Word" for 2019!

New Year's Eve always comes on me like a sleeting, snowy mixture of to beautiful snowflake filled days and bitterly cold nights - it's a time to reflect and course correct. 2018 has been a year of great growth and change for me. But like the cocoon unsnarled in his nest, to emerge and to move forward, is like a rebirth both beautiful and painful at the exact same moment.
I think as widows, because we loved, we have learned, and because we have learned, so we grow. As with any new birth, we are excited, hopeful and so in love with the future, and at the same instant a small tug from the past tries to hold on and pull us back to the warm lull of our womb, our past, and for me the comfort of an old green couch...
As most of you know, this has been my year of YES! 2018 marked the 7th year of Kevin's passing, three years after a long hard battle with cancer. I needed to do something different. After watching my beautiful daughter give birth to her amazing daughter Charlotte, while struggling with her own health and life on the morning after they lost there beloved home with a sweet little nursery for this babe, moving into my home for refuge, as I moved to my Maman's home, worked part-time at a circus, a church and a  choosing my daily wear out of the back of my car, while helping to take care of my dying father in law in Austin, and my mother in law who had a stroke the day after we finally got my daughter out of the hospital... I cashed in all my chips and flew to Fiji in January of 2018. And so began my amazing year of possibilities...


Boat on the Beach, Taveuni, Fiji
My life has changed so much since then it is truly unbelievable.
I began dating a "platonic Photography friend" I met John thru my dear friend Nyla, our Modern Widows Club Houston Chapters Leader, in a French Cooking Class she invited me to. We started dating and traveling and sharing our lives together. I got a job. I really starting living as a brand new me. It's different and not everyone likes it. It is hard on many. I have less "free" time to share with family and friends. Between my new love relationship, a new job, and taking care of myself for the first time in forever, I have had to make some shifts and shimmies to make life work. But it is working. It has been a breaking out of the past into the new... that moment of truth when the new child emerges all covered in new birth, to be caught, and cradled, and clothed to be all clean, and loved in new life. Again. 
2018 was truly a wonderful year of wonder, of wisdom, of growing and learning. The road less traveled for sure. I could never imagine the places I've been, the wonderful beautiful family and friends I have met because of John, and the new "we" we are creating. Since he is a widower too, after many many years of marriage he gets "it" and most of all, he gets me. He actually loves the brand "new me." Wow!

"To be in Love Again with a Man that Loves Me for the "New" Me! 
I wrote the card shared above during Jodie Rodenbaugh's retreat. I found it in my nightstand while decluttering the other day... My heartfelt prayer was "To Be In Love Again with a Man that Loves ME for the 'New' me.

Wow. I had totally forgotten the note until I found it. Then I realized it was real. It was happening. I am living it. I cried when I reread it. Now. Changed. Loved. Transformed. The Vision is Real. We are standing in the middle of it in faith.  And I believed. 

Now, its a new year of possibilities...

It's time to ACT... Authentic, Committed, Tenacious - My "Word" for 2019!

When I counseled with Carolyn Moor, one of the things she tells us is to choose a word that describes how we want to feel at the end of the year...instead of setting goals first, you choose your perfect word to describe how you want to feel. 

gave up my FEAR in 2016,
I wanted HOPE in 2017
In 2018 I wanted to be LOVED again!

My Word for 2019 is ACT; Authentic, Committed and Tenacious. I'm Holding on with all my power! 
As widows united together through MWC, we are moving forward, arm in arm.  We are finding our wings. We are beginning to take flight. We will hope again. We will love again. We will live again. I promise.


Martin Luther King, Jr. said so eloquently, 

 “I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear.” 

We never lose love. We may miss love, but it lasts forever. It never really leaves us. We can only add love. Take a chance. Make a choice to take a chance to make a change and don't' look back. In other words, ACT! We shall overcome and live, and laugh and love again. It's true. Don't be afraid to see where the road leads you. You may want to consider a road less traveled. No matter where your journey takes you, I wish you all the best. 
Remember Love Lasts Forever. Always.